5 Steps to Getting the Girl of Your Dreams

Step 1 – Finding Her
You always hear weddings are the best place to find hot single women. Is it true? Of course it is. The sight of seeing two people completely in love gets women’s hormones raging. Offer her a drink at the bar, and you’re off to a good start.

Other places to find hot single women:
Dance clubs, birthday parties, supermarkets, bookstores, outlets, libraries, grocery stores, they’re everywhere… Open your eyes and use the force!

Step 2 – Stand Out
The first step is being noticed. If the girl you’re after is truly as hot as you think she is, she’s probably being chased by several guys already. It’s time to separate yourself from the pack, and be noticed. You might not be able to change your mug (without costly plastic surgery), but you can change your appearance. Here’s some easy ways to do so:

No need to drive the hottest car in the hood, but a nice ride can win you some bonus points. Remember to clean the car and vacuum the interior before your first date. Nothing kills the mood better than old smelly trash from McDonald’s.

Money to Burn: Ferrari F430, Bugatti Veyron, Mercedes Benz SLR
On a Budget: BMW M3, Porsche 997, Lotus Elise, Audi RS4
Broke as a Joke: VW Golf R32, Honda S2000, Nissan 350Z, Audi A4

Get a watch. Why would you need a watch when your cellphone tells time and does a gazillion other things? Because a watch is a statement about your personal style. It also lets her know that time is important and being on time matters to you.

Money to Burn: Rolex, Cartier, Omega
On a Budget: Tag Heuer, Tumi, Movado
Broke as a Joke: Seiko, Timex, Diesel, Swiss Army

The most expensive item in your closet should be your shoes. They’re the foundation of every outfit, and she’s bound to check them out, so they better look good.

Money to Burn: Bally, Canali, Gucci
On a Budget: Cole Haan, Ecco, Ralph Lauren
Broke as a Joke: Sketchers, Kenneth Cole Reaction, Adidas, Puma

Step 3 – The Chase
Women love to be pursued. Lines are bad. The only one you should be using is “Hi, My name is…” Approach her with confidence, because women have a sixth sense for weakness. Don’t talk about your job, or how much you make. It’s the last thing she wants to hear (unless she’s a grubby leech, in which you’ve probably chosen the wrong girl). You’re trying to get the girl of your dreams, not a job at Google.

Keep the conversations relevant to the moment – the band that’s playing on stage, the clown in the funny looking hat, or a current movie that’s out. Keep the conversation less personal and she’ll feel less threatened. The is goal is to let her know you’re trying to get to know her and not into her pants.

Nice guys always complain that they can’t get the girls. Jerks get the girls. I admit they do. Jerks have a unique way of standing out, but they don’t last very long.

The key is to show her you’re confident without being arrogant. Stand up straight, and look into her eyes when she’s talking. Be a Gentleman. Help an old lady with her groceries to the car, or give up your seat on the bus to a single mother and child. Thoughtful and sweet guys give her hope that chivalry isn’t dead.

Step 4 – 9th Inning
A text message goes a long way after a date. Following a wonderful night, a simple text message to her cell phone with something as sweet as “goodnight, sweet dreams.” will have her melting in your arms. Follow up with a call two days later. Ask her how her days are going and mention something funny about the first time you saw her. This is your opportunity to ask her out on a second date.

When you see her again, compliment her, and make it something other than her looks. She’s heard a thousand times how pretty her eyes are. Tell her how funny she is, if she likes to crack jokes. If she’s trendy, tell her how hot her fashion sense is. Genuine compliments will be engraved in her memory forever.

Step 5 – Lock Down
When you’re out at the ice cream shop, prove that you’ve been paying attention by ordering her favorite flavor without asking. Drop off a cup of the Starbucks Mocha Frappuccino she likes so much on her lunch break at work. It’s the little things you notice, that show her how much you adore and want to be with her. Plus, it’ll make her putty in your hands.

Keep this up, and the girl of your dreams will be yours!

Note what a joke. I am not this girl

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